Thursday, August 19, 2010

X-Men Onited

Brad: one of the guys at lunch was nicknamed "fingers"
Brad: An animator
Shay: hmm
Brad: I don't know what.
Shay: they're these things on the end of your handstumps
Brad: why
Shay: that's what.
Shay: I don't know why we have them though, they just get chopped off
Shay: no matter what I do
Brad: what if your fingers grew like beaverteeth? And you were always having to gnaw the ends off
Shay: I think they do
Brad: oh, fingernails, right
Shay: you have those right?
Brad: somewhat
Shay: ...
Brad: but they're metal, like in that movie
Shay: X-Men 3?
Brad: and my blood is acid
Brad: no
Brad: alien resurrection
Shay: oh, right
Brad: They didn't even make an X-men 3
Shay: yes they did
Brad: so who's to say? there could be metalfingernailman in that movie
Shay: there was an angel in it, and some naked chick
Brad: that's #2
Shay: I was thinking of X-Men 2, it had a metalfingerwoman in it
Brad: xmen united
Brad: that's the wolverine movie
Brad: completely different
Shay: you either totally have these movies confused, or are trying to confuse me
Brad: Looks like it's time to prove you wrong again
Shay: in #2 Wolverine fights another admantium chick, she has long fingernails like his claws
Shay: in #3 there's the angel guy and the kid who robs people of their powers
Shay: and I've never seen the Wolverine movie but the girl with fingernails... probably isn't in it
Shay: Liev Schreiber is though, everyone told me I look exactly like him in that movie
Brad: In #2, there's an onion monster with a thirst for liquid blood, and in #3, they take a trip to the merry christmas.
Shay: hahaha
Shay: why specify liquid blood?
Brad: I didn't write it
Shay: hahahahahaha

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Meat a?

Brad suggested, as he often does, that I am incorrect in pronouncing the prefix "meta" as "MAY-ta".

Shay: "It turns out there are three common pronunciations: METT-uh, MAY-tuh, and MEE-tuh. Interestingly, many people feel that "their" way is the "right way" (that's human nature for you) and have never heard anyone pronounce it differently. In the end, any of the three is as correct as the others."
Shay: see, everyone is equally right
Shay: except the people saying MEE-tuh, who are clearly idiots.
Shay: or just hungry
Shay: ...for meat.
Brad: That's like how the indians had the perception that their god was a wolf who turned into an indian.
Shay: not really though
Brad: Shay, it's the fact that perception taints reality
Brad: If you observe an indian, it dies.
Brad: It's the heisenberg uncertainty principle
Shay: also I think this mythology you're quoting is from Twilight
Shay: except for the quantum mechanics part.
Brad: I haven't ever seen the movie twilight
Brad: If you pass an indian through a bose-einstein condensate, you can slow down light enough to sparkle a vampire.
Shay: now it all makes sense.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Adventure #-1: Adventure Textellent Shay's and Brad

Brad: Score 1,300
Shay: Yay!
Brad: Achievements unlocked - 8
Shay: I'm so good at this!
Shay: What am I doing?
Brad: You have died
Shay: :O
Brad: You are being eaten by slugs
Shay: my corpse stands up
Brad: You have fallen into a pit of slugs
Shay: my corpse is clumsy.
Brad: Don't understand "backwards"
Shay: this is running backwards?
Brad: To the East is PIT O SLUGS To the West is ALCATRAZ to the North is Magic Kingdom
Shay: look
Brad: You have: Seven dwarven charms, A talisman of eternal seepage, MAGIC ROPE
Shay: eat pineapple upside-down cake; i
Brad: The Pineapple Upside Down Cake has cornered you in the hall of mirrors. It will serve you riddles until your mind breaks. You may not survive.
Shay: e
Brad: You have crossed the river to the east. Further east is the HALL OF MIRRORS. An aged sign says "Beware of Pineapple Upside Down Cake"
Shay: take talisman of internal inconsistency; e
Brad: You have shunned his people for the last time. The leprechaun haberdasher offers you a talisman of internal incontinence.
Shay: shun leprechauns
Brad: You have defeated the evil slug overlord. The leprechaun people have been freed, but at a heavy cost. Your now loyal subjects pledge their undying loyalty and as many wishes as you can use in your lifetime.
Shay: wait!
Brad: Offended, the evil Slug Overlord lunges at you with tentacles and howitzer legs,, certain doom is upon you as you remember what your uncle once told you about evil slug overlords. "You gotta just wait for them to trip on their shoelaces. They never tie their shoes"
Shay: man.. this is kinda painful...
Brad: The slug overlord offers you a dainty cake made of leavened bread and frosting as a symbol of peace and friendship. "I am sure this will ease your pain."
Brad: Don't understand "confused "
Shay: ... I'm confused by all this, but at least I know I'm not going to die at the end!
Brad: Invalid name. You have died. Your corpse is resurrected in the oppressed leprechaun village. The slug overlord gazes upon you in a threatening way. He stoops down and offers you a plate of something tasty.
Shay: what
Shay: am I alive?
Shay: ????
Shay: you hurt my head sometimes, Brad.
Brad: It's what I do

(If you want to read this adventure in reverse order, here go just.)