Adventure #-1: Adventure Textellent Shay's and Brad

Brad: Score 1,300
Shay: Yay!
Brad: Achievements unlocked - 8
Brad: LEVEL UP
Shay: I'm so good at this!
Shay: What am I doing?
Brad: You have died
Shay: :O
Brad: You are being eaten by slugs
Shay: my corpse stands up
Brad: You have fallen into a pit of slugs
Shay: my corpse is clumsy.
Brad: Don't understand "backwards"
Shay: ......so this is running backwards?
Brad: To the East is PIT O SLUGS To the West is ALCATRAZ to the North is Magic Kingdom
Shay: look
Brad: You have: Seven dwarven charms, A talisman of eternal seepage, MAGIC ROPE
Shay: eat pineapple upside-down cake; i
Brad: The Pineapple Upside Down Cake has cornered you in the hall of mirrors. It will serve you riddles until your mind breaks. You may not survive.
Shay: e
Brad: You have crossed the river to the east. Further east is the HALL OF MIRRORS. An aged sign says "Beware of Pineapple Upside Down Cake"
Shay: take talisman of internal inconsistency; e
Brad: You have shunned his people for the last time. The leprechaun haberdasher offers you a talisman of internal incontinence.
Shay: shun leprechauns
Brad: You have defeated the evil slug overlord. The leprechaun people have been freed, but at a heavy cost. Your now loyal subjects pledge their undying loyalty and as many wishes as you can use in your lifetime.
Shay: wait!
Brad: Offended, the evil Slug Overlord lunges at you with tentacles and howitzer legs,, certain doom is upon you as you remember what your uncle once told you about evil slug overlords. "You gotta just wait for them to trip on their shoelaces. They never tie their shoes"
Shay: man.. this is kinda painful...
Brad: The slug overlord offers you a dainty cake made of leavened bread and frosting as a symbol of peace and friendship. "I am sure this will ease your pain."
Brad: Don't understand "confused "
Shay: ... I'm confused by all this, but at least I know I'm not going to die at the end!
Brad: Invalid name. You have died. Your corpse is resurrected in the oppressed leprechaun village. The slug overlord gazes upon you in a threatening way. He stoops down and offers you a plate of something tasty.
Shay: what
Brad: CHOOSE NAME
Shay: am I alive?
Shay: ????
Brad: INSERT QUESTION MARKS
Brad: WELCOME TO LEPRECHAUN VILLAGE
Shay: you hurt my head sometimes, Brad.
Brad: It's what I do

(If you want to read this adventure in reverse order, here go just.)