Brad: You are in a large field, to the north is a spider. to the east is a fountain garden. To the west is a path to the south is Jamboree Physical Stimulation Simulation 5000 robotic excitement.
Brad: You arrive at Ted, the large spider. To the south is the crash site, to the east is a waffle, to the west is a dystopian nightmare replete with sadness and disappointment
Shay: look Ted
Brad: Ted regards you with contempt. He has a frying pan in one mandible and he guards a magic shoe on a stump.
Shay: ask Ted about shoe
Brad: don't understand about
Shay: take shoe
Brad: Ted disapproves
Shay: eat shoe
Brad: as the delicate shoe meat passes into your mouth, flavored by the feet of a hundred warriors, you succumb to an overdose of leather LSD. Ted removes your neck bones from the back of your spine, and you are eaten by chiggers
Shay: look chiggers
Brad: your zombie eyes gaze upon the army of chiggers high fiving Ted. Nice work, guys, he says.
Brad: you stand, as ted inserts a thousand eggs into your abdomen. "I gotta propagate my species." Ted picks up the TV remote and puts it in the frying pan.
Brad: You go west to work at Midway
Shay: game over